Tuesday, May 19, 2015

The Chaotic Kid

The chaotic soul,

Obsessed with conquering women,

Seducing them to vulnerability,

Only to abandon them.

The recreation of childhood events,

Yet this time in control.

In search of closure.

What does he search for?

An unmet need?

The span of time in life,

Where a child is supposed to receive unconditional love.

Recreating moments in search for what was lost.

Anger, the first step in grieving and mourning the loss.

A long journey of healing.

So where is freedom?

Freedom comes from realizing there is no need to create chaos,

No need to test the waters,

No need to test if others will stay,

An unfair test indeed!

For all give love conditionally.

And that span of life has passed,

And that need can never be met,

For even a parent can no longer love an adult child unconditionally,

As seen by all children who trigger into their parent's brokenness.

Thank God, unconditional love is not needed as an adult.

At least not unconditional love from others,

For the fulfillment by others,

In early childhood,

Was always supposed to point to something greater.

<SI> Scott Izu, PhD
© May 2015

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