Saturday, July 9, 2016

Wrecking Ball

The ultimate rejection,


Flashed through me like glass hitting the floor

The pain so deep I scattered

Just wishing it would go away.

Pieces of glass on the floor were sources of my identity

The medical institute accepted me in

As the base ball bat slipped through my fingers to the floor

Wanting to shatter windows

To show what raged inside me

Like distant memories of an angry father

To make the external match the internal

And the judgement that weighed on my shoulders

Was enough to convince me

That I was bad

That I was wrong

Enough to convince me

My kids would be better off without me

Heart broken I was willing to leave forever

A friend from the least expected of places walked and talked

Convinced me to battle

"The war we wage is not of flesh and bones," He said

Then, a voice deep within me

Whispered to fight

From my knees

Wounded and broken


I did

<SI> Scott Izu, PhD
Copyright 2016

Thursday, July 7, 2016

The Blacker The Berry

I have tasted of the sweetest fruit,

Beauties that you never would have known,

My conservative exterior is the perfect camoflouge

For my restless interior,

I thought any woman would quiet my soul,

But I soon learned that was not the case.

So like a wild stalion,

I thought if I was to roam free,

That would bring me peace,

Threesomes and orgies,

I was showered with attention,

Yet, it left me even more alone.

I thought a popular cheerleader or actress or model would please me

For nothing feels greater than the envy of eyes

As I walk through stares standing next to a tight red dress

But intimacy only revealed the subtle flaws.

I thought perhaps a woman from my roots was the answer,

So I chased English and Japanese and Puerto Rican girls.

I have tried it all but to no avail.

Was youth the answer,

Thirsting like a blood lust,

Chasing a mystic fountain?

No, for my years have aged my taste buds.

One might think I must be gay,

But no, I have tried that too.

Unfortunately enough,

I have tried a few.

But all and all,

Experience does not seem to lead me closer.

More like frozen with the possibility,

That perhaps there is no hope.


<SI> Scott Izu, PhD
July 2016

Sunday, July 3, 2016

Poet's Dream Anthology Book

May 2016 Poet's Dream Anthology Book

Letting a Lover Go

It seems like a lifetime ago,

I remember the scent, the scene, the feeling,

And the moment I recollect the memory,

Instantly I miss it all.

  My mind wanders through a myriad of ways,

  To reopen the door,

  But the door was closed for a reason,

  So I must force myself to remember how to let go,

Then, like a shard to the heart,

I must actually do it.

<SI> Scott Izu, PhD
July 2016