I am sorry to hear of the recent betrayal that ensued. A dozen years of loyalty and Mark decides to stray. What an asshole!
You asked, "Why God? How could you let this happen?"
The way I see it, you have three options.
1. Justice, giving someone what they deserve.
Let Mark burn. Take everything from him. Rip his life to shreds. Let your wrath show him financial ruin. Destroy his honor and relationships. He deserves it, definitely.
This will feel good to take revenge and will fuel the flames of bitterness and contempt that ignite within you.
Unfortunately, your efforts will fall short. Your punishments will never stack up high enough to give Mark what he really deserves. And you will carry the burden of enforcement.
2. Mercy, is not giving people what they deserve.
Amicable separation. Take the high road. Let Mark destroy himself. A fool's lips destroy himself.
You will walk away with dignity. You will feel good about yourself and your behavior. You will have the peace that comes with no regrets.
3. Grace, giving someone something they don't deserve.
You have a choice! Such a blessing! A unique opportunity to show God you truly understand His gift. This is not about Mark, or you and Mark. This is about you.
Thankful for a dozen years of loyalty. Thankful for the daily blessings you have been given. Even now. Even now!
You will never have a choice like this again in your life. And if you choose to care for the broken, sick soul God has entrusted in your hands. To revive him, to stand by him, to breathe words of affirmation, nurture and care. If you choose this route, you choose to give grace.
How easy is it to forgive a small trespass? And how much more thankful is the one forgiven a large debt than the one forgiven a small debt.
No, this is not about Mark. This is your chance to show your gratitude for the debts you have been forgiven.
If you choose this, I promise, you will have built a man, deep with gratitude. When years have wasted away and children are grown. A room filled with family and friends, will echo with the words of honor towards you.
If you choose this, your rewards will be countless.
Bless you Abigail,
<SI> Scott Izu, PhD
© June 2015